I can't say whether or not I love it here, I do not love the way I'm existing here.
I've sent out so many resumes. I've been on so many interviews and came up with nothing. I'm so grateful that my parents were good to help me out but I am sitting in an empty house the day after Thanksgiving realizing how lonely I am in the middle of where I'm supposed to be. It's cold outside and the control freak Korean landlord doesn't like the heat. He imposes his agendas and makes them into everybody else's problem, we pay for his lifestyle and put up with his problems and we get shelter.
On top of his 1003 other houserules (scribed in Hangul) in a house where Korean is primarily spoken and NOBODY speaks to each other. I've lived with these guys for two months now and have only existed to be polite and nothing more. Nobody knows much, they're all just getting by. And I need more.
The landlord is a reservist in the National Guard, Korean, and ugh! Still irritatingly pompous and misogynist. He's fighting agenda ridden ex-wifey for custody of the THREE ill behaved wound up noisy brats and a Korean FOB ex-wifey whom he swears is extorting him for her family (and stiffing her kids on the child support to support her parents who are here...not managing their money. But how is this even my business? Except that I'm putting up with it.)
Who have leverage in the house when the tenants are forbidden according to the rules.
I can afford my own room here and he speaks English so I put up with it.
I'm stuck in a place in my life where I'm still single with no job and fussing with b.s.
I feel unproductive and not only invisible. Things are not peachy king. First of all, for what it costs and the care and effort the Koreans put into this part of town- it's disgusting. The Koreans ARE rude. Responsible but rude. Excuse me if I don't already speak Korean, I never had the opportunity to know it.
Of course I have yet ANOTHER dent in my car from trying to park in Hollywood. Blech Hollywood. I've been through the gay scene. Sometimes it's really nice but in my humble opinion boring unless you have friends there. Or anywhere.
I didn't grow up here.
My roots are not here.
I don't do drugs. As a matter of fact, I HATE Drugs.
I'm not in a clique'. I'm trying to figure out what to do with myself. In a new town.
Everyone I know anywhere is tied down with kids and even when we live in the same towns you really have to coordinate social hour. So I'm supposed to meet people. WITHOUT MONEY.
Only if I can find a decent church or organized event to be a part of. Otherwise...too much.
It's not safe, especially after dark and it gets dark early. I have NEVER in my life felt afraid, being mugged will do that to you. My therapist (yes I have a therapist already) is off this week. And my parents are relaxing. The other part of the family have other things going on. Which is fine, it's better than infighting. ANYTHING is better than infighting.
But the recruiters...everyone. Is flakey, full of b.s.,
And I do NOT want to sit in traffic forever just to have a job.
So much to consider.... the one thing that I absolutely HATE about Los Angeles is the crime mixed in with the over-zealous excessive high cost of living index-ESPECIALLY RENTS AND MORTGAGES!!!
Crime again is merely a case of heightened, unrealistic expectation but carried out in a more physically malicious manner on victims. And the politics here apparently condones this because of the ghettotastic narco-trafficking. That everyone else is adversely affected by.
So of course the Obama Union loving Alinsky-trotting politics is to blame the cops for what little violence the cops nationwide committed in contrast to the power abusing, drugged out, psycho druggies because cops had to shoot at a few VIOLENT black criminals. They are forcing this garbage down our throats.
I'm a minority who suffered discrimination and I haven't inflicted malice, harm or setbacks to others.
Nobody thanked me, nobody even looked at me favorably because I have done so. Yet I suffer because of those @$$holes and whatever is enabling them to pull soooo much $h*t.
The beautiful people are in rehab and unfortunately rehab leaves too much to be desired.
People need to come to terms with themselves and accept the fact that they are beautiful and worthy. Worthy of holding up real standards, worthy of loving and taking care of themselves.
It's not here across the board. Thriving on negativity is not power, I don't care how much money one has.
Friday, November 27, 2015
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
Moved, worked, lost job, towed, Moved, GOT ROBBED!!! (lost keys/phone), stiffed --- still health issues.
etc etc....
Moved back to K-Town Los Angeles. It looks better, like it should but it's still dangerous and crime ridden.
On my run Tuesday morning (9/8/2015) - I was chased from behind and grabbed by a really large black thug and robbed on a dimly lit street in between an apartment complex and a church.
The thug and his buddy (shorter black guy) hid behind cars parked on the streets waiting for someone to pass by.
Thuggie himself stood about 6'3-6'5 and looked like someone who could pull off a great halo act/athlete with the ability to play sports. He wore a t-shirt, red shorts, white socks and a pair of clean shoes. He didn't speak like a hoodlum thug, I wonder if they were his decoys.
Camelbaks are latched in the front so it's not as easy to get off as any other backpack or purse. So he jerked me around a bunch of times trying to get the bag off of me. Then he managed to throw me on the ground where we were still playing tug of war. His arms were too long and he was much stronger than I am. I'm 5'2, 100 pounds. It would've been inefficient for me to strike at him.
I didn't have a chance to pull out my mace before they got to me.
I called the cops at a nearby Tom Tom Cafe on Wilshire a block away.
Some other black guy on crack passing by heard someone snap and he went off the deep end (like in hypnosis) about how cops were abusing power and racist and all that stuff. While the cop was trying to write up this report on a rather scary situation for me?
I think someone else called the cops - I had a seperate incident number than what showed up on the crime map. Yes I found myself on the crime map.
No it wasn't PR firms, drive by media, politicians, libertarians, BLM movement, Al Sharpton, DEA,
Alinskytrots, Clintonites or other who helped me.
Moved back to K-Town Los Angeles. It looks better, like it should but it's still dangerous and crime ridden.
On my run Tuesday morning (9/8/2015) - I was chased from behind and grabbed by a really large black thug and robbed on a dimly lit street in between an apartment complex and a church.
The thug and his buddy (shorter black guy) hid behind cars parked on the streets waiting for someone to pass by.
Thuggie himself stood about 6'3-6'5 and looked like someone who could pull off a great halo act/athlete with the ability to play sports. He wore a t-shirt, red shorts, white socks and a pair of clean shoes. He didn't speak like a hoodlum thug, I wonder if they were his decoys.
Camelbaks are latched in the front so it's not as easy to get off as any other backpack or purse. So he jerked me around a bunch of times trying to get the bag off of me. Then he managed to throw me on the ground where we were still playing tug of war. His arms were too long and he was much stronger than I am. I'm 5'2, 100 pounds. It would've been inefficient for me to strike at him.
I didn't have a chance to pull out my mace before they got to me.
I called the cops at a nearby Tom Tom Cafe on Wilshire a block away.
Some other black guy on crack passing by heard someone snap and he went off the deep end (like in hypnosis) about how cops were abusing power and racist and all that stuff. While the cop was trying to write up this report on a rather scary situation for me?
I think someone else called the cops - I had a seperate incident number than what showed up on the crime map. Yes I found myself on the crime map.
No it wasn't PR firms, drive by media, politicians, libertarians, BLM movement, Al Sharpton, DEA,
Alinskytrots, Clintonites or other who helped me.
Friday, July 24, 2015
I might be the only person who thinks that Taylor Swift is the ugliest polished flawless person ever.
The never ending spamming through the MSM wasn't enough.
A 7 figure investment is required for an act to be "discovered" in the biz, and Swifts' caucasian parents are rich thieving parasitic bankers.
I don't like Minaj due to content in her videos.
But omg. There's something about Swift's delusions of grandeur when she can afford the marketing when people are expected to shell out $600/ticket to see her live in this recession that her parents benefitted from.
It's obviously "rare" (sarcasm) to see a skinny white chick lip sync to autotunes.
I'm glad the marketing departments are making money off of her.
But give it a rest already.
A 7 figure investment is required for an act to be "discovered" in the biz, and Swifts' caucasian parents are rich thieving parasitic bankers.
I don't like Minaj due to content in her videos.
But omg. There's something about Swift's delusions of grandeur when she can afford the marketing when people are expected to shell out $600/ticket to see her live in this recession that her parents benefitted from.
It's obviously "rare" (sarcasm) to see a skinny white chick lip sync to autotunes.
I'm glad the marketing departments are making money off of her.
But give it a rest already.
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
Facebook horrors
Facebook is an interesting dilemma where I can scope out peers and such to see what they're about.
Well on the first note, I hate Florida. Not as much as I hate Kentucky.
But worst of all I hated being perpetually trapped with people whom I have nothing in common with except that I was stuck in the same zip code as they were during high school- and Facepage keeps us tied.
First out of one "friend"'s account, I found only two other Asians out of over 1000 people.
True story. She's in Florida.
The others who left the state of Ohio, the Kentucky ugly part of Ohio where I was trapped?
Only a few who didn't run to the deep south to double their body weight came out west, became an ass and how many minorities do they have on their account?
Everyone FROM California that I know have people of at least 4 different races on their accounts.
And that's because that's who they know.
I have absolutely nothing in common and I don't know what to do with myself in their presence. Everyone is toxic it seems, it's all agenda ridden for, well no benefit to me.
IT sucks ass enough to be in a military where the southerners who run it over don't think well of non-whites? OR culture clash. Bully loser thug vs. disciplinarian thug then to be stuck in the middle where I would rather make nice with my peers and set myself up for success in life.
NO.
But I deleted this J@ckhole and his wife because we got into an argument when I made signs for Occupy L.A.
I used to work in the finance sector.
I am more qualified than their pathetic breeding parasitic @$$. It didn't matter, they couldn't expand their tunnel vision of prejudice to accept reality and that's their problem. The powerchannels from high school enforce the "tolerance" of these shitbags.
How funny is it that the people who go off the deep end about military not wearing uniforms for their safety is a guy who weighs literally double what each soldier, sailor and marine do; has a civilian job and "bad knees". Nah dude. YOU go put yourself in harms way in place of the soldier if your mouth is big enough to dribble on about it.
You're talking shit while Victoria Nuland hag is out of shape herself and will be defending the U.S. by herself when she provokes WWIII. The troops are not that great. They're underpaid self loathing monkies (many who I got stuck with) and a little out of shape themselves and cry like bitches when Michelle Obama urges them not to eat fried food. After she got her liposuction on tax payers' dime.
THe Ukies that we were robbed for are a bunch of pathetic violent Nazi thugs on meth who will get their asses beaten by a 6 grader.
These neocons.
These warhawk racist methed out loser garbage.
When Nuland gets her way and puts our worn out troops (the GOOD guys) into multiple tours of the FOURTH war (WWIII) for the draft dodging oil mongering real estate flipping baby boomer beatnik flowerchildren; the U.S. is so getting their asses kicked. The fucking U.S. "troops" are overweight, slow- thank God for weapons because that's their only way of getting out alive.
Well on the first note, I hate Florida. Not as much as I hate Kentucky.
But worst of all I hated being perpetually trapped with people whom I have nothing in common with except that I was stuck in the same zip code as they were during high school- and Facepage keeps us tied.
First out of one "friend"'s account, I found only two other Asians out of over 1000 people.
True story. She's in Florida.
The others who left the state of Ohio, the Kentucky ugly part of Ohio where I was trapped?
Only a few who didn't run to the deep south to double their body weight came out west, became an ass and how many minorities do they have on their account?
Everyone FROM California that I know have people of at least 4 different races on their accounts.
And that's because that's who they know.
I have absolutely nothing in common and I don't know what to do with myself in their presence. Everyone is toxic it seems, it's all agenda ridden for, well no benefit to me.
IT sucks ass enough to be in a military where the southerners who run it over don't think well of non-whites? OR culture clash. Bully loser thug vs. disciplinarian thug then to be stuck in the middle where I would rather make nice with my peers and set myself up for success in life.NO.
But I deleted this J@ckhole and his wife because we got into an argument when I made signs for Occupy L.A.
I used to work in the finance sector.
I am more qualified than their pathetic breeding parasitic @$$. It didn't matter, they couldn't expand their tunnel vision of prejudice to accept reality and that's their problem. The powerchannels from high school enforce the "tolerance" of these shitbags.
How funny is it that the people who go off the deep end about military not wearing uniforms for their safety is a guy who weighs literally double what each soldier, sailor and marine do; has a civilian job and "bad knees". Nah dude. YOU go put yourself in harms way in place of the soldier if your mouth is big enough to dribble on about it.
You're talking shit while Victoria Nuland hag is out of shape herself and will be defending the U.S. by herself when she provokes WWIII. The troops are not that great. They're underpaid self loathing monkies (many who I got stuck with) and a little out of shape themselves and cry like bitches when Michelle Obama urges them not to eat fried food. After she got her liposuction on tax payers' dime.
THe Ukies that we were robbed for are a bunch of pathetic violent Nazi thugs on meth who will get their asses beaten by a 6 grader.
These neocons.
These warhawk racist methed out loser garbage.
When Nuland gets her way and puts our worn out troops (the GOOD guys) into multiple tours of the FOURTH war (WWIII) for the draft dodging oil mongering real estate flipping baby boomer beatnik flowerchildren; the U.S. is so getting their asses kicked. The fucking U.S. "troops" are overweight, slow- thank God for weapons because that's their only way of getting out alive.
Saturday, July 4, 2015
It wasn't worth it
This morning, the 4th of July- my post rhabdomyolysis pain was somehow converted to pressure in my abdomen strong enough to cause sharp pains. It happened with the sharp increase in desert temperatures this morning.
I was cleaning house in exchange for allowance until just recently when my mom physically attacked me when I told her that my life wasn't worth it.
Why did I put up with so much, so much unnecessary negativity on top of garbage from THEIR government and THEIR stupid ugly country- so I can be sick! SOMEDAY ALREADY HAPPENED MOM!!! Stupid. Just because she's too stupid to understand anything her beaten baby accomplished doesn't mean it didn't happen. STUPID baby beating bitch didn't even know what my major was when I was in school.
This definately isn't what I set myself up for in life. This isn't what I wanted. I didn't want to be unemployed, SICK and at the mercy of these people in the midst of a desert with nothing but uneducated nasty ugly tatted up methheads and no jobs.
My dad takes out his deep hatred for spoiled white women on me.
It was never about me. It was about his stupid complex.
The misogyny courtesy of the self loathing creeps in the military was not bad enough- try being thrown at them when I was sick with horrible endometrial/pcos pain. They didn't want to understand.
They blame the victim because it's too hard for their stupid minds to understand. The lame stream misinformation didn't help.
The ONLY reason why my dad cared about my health AT ALL was because my BMI dropped to 17.
He and the other white STUPID Americans are so bitter if everyone isn't obese with diabetes and heart disease. It's about his STUPID complex, it was NEVER about me.
I resent every one who pushed me to think that he was a good guy. He isn't.
They gave me $1600 to move out when i found a "2 month" temp gig that actually lasted 3 days.
When I chose not to sign a lease in Santa Barbara for that assignment, my parents wouldn't let me come home for a few days and I lost a lot of money on that.
So I came back- they didn't give me an allowance yet still demanded that I keep up the chores.
So I kept up the chores.
Then NICELY asked my dad for money. I was LUCKY to get a little for gas and a phone card since i'm doing job interviews....Instead of just telling me that he didn't have any, he just drug it out in the worst possible horrible way about how this is was all my fault, how I'm wrong, that I'm not trying hard enough---HE LIED.
I don't trust him.
He betrayed me.
My parents had a meal ticket for the visa sponsor parasites- stupid projecting manipulative violent thuggie JERK!!!
Then! Then he had the NERVE to accuse me of low self esteem!
FUCK YOU DAD!!! MY SELF ESTEEM IS JUST FINE, THE IDIOTS WHO PUT ME DOWN IN MY TIME OF NEED REALLY NEED A SELF ESTEEM CHECK.
STUPID UGLY HIDEOUS GARBAGE TWEAKER TRASH ENTITLED THIEVING AMERICANS AND THEIR STUPID POLITICAL THEATRE, BULLY TACTICS- INFERIORITY COMPLEX...
JUST BECAUSE I WAS WRONGED DOESN'T MEAN MY SELF ESTEEM IS LACKING, BECAUSE UNLIKE YOU AND MOM - I WAS FORCED TO ACCOMPLISH THINGS FOR MYSELF AND EVERYTHING I EVER HAD WAS DONE BY ME ACCOMPLISHING WHAT I DID. Stupid twofaced bitch boy of white priveledge.
YOU'RE THE LOSER ASSCLOWN WHO HAS NOT ACCOMPLISHED SHIT!!!!!
Michelle- this lady they deal with for my mom's concessionaire- bad mouthed me to my mom when the garbage ugly stupid fat slut didn't do her own job.
Of course my traitor blood thirsty backstabbing baby beating bitch parents just took her word for it.
So I have no money and the jerks decided THEY were going to pick out my food since, like- you know they're not giving me money to buy my own. Protein Lunas pushed up my cholesterol and my weight. I'm stuck dodging high fructose corn syrup and hormone laden garbage in their cupboards. I just applied for food stamps. Maybe then I could afford some Pepto without going through that horrible episode.
My parents are the most two faced, violent thug creeps.
I was cleaning house in exchange for allowance until just recently when my mom physically attacked me when I told her that my life wasn't worth it.
Why did I put up with so much, so much unnecessary negativity on top of garbage from THEIR government and THEIR stupid ugly country- so I can be sick! SOMEDAY ALREADY HAPPENED MOM!!! Stupid. Just because she's too stupid to understand anything her beaten baby accomplished doesn't mean it didn't happen. STUPID baby beating bitch didn't even know what my major was when I was in school.
This definately isn't what I set myself up for in life. This isn't what I wanted. I didn't want to be unemployed, SICK and at the mercy of these people in the midst of a desert with nothing but uneducated nasty ugly tatted up methheads and no jobs.
My dad takes out his deep hatred for spoiled white women on me.
It was never about me. It was about his stupid complex.
The misogyny courtesy of the self loathing creeps in the military was not bad enough- try being thrown at them when I was sick with horrible endometrial/pcos pain. They didn't want to understand.
They blame the victim because it's too hard for their stupid minds to understand. The lame stream misinformation didn't help.
The ONLY reason why my dad cared about my health AT ALL was because my BMI dropped to 17.
He and the other white STUPID Americans are so bitter if everyone isn't obese with diabetes and heart disease. It's about his STUPID complex, it was NEVER about me.
I resent every one who pushed me to think that he was a good guy. He isn't.
They gave me $1600 to move out when i found a "2 month" temp gig that actually lasted 3 days.
When I chose not to sign a lease in Santa Barbara for that assignment, my parents wouldn't let me come home for a few days and I lost a lot of money on that.
So I came back- they didn't give me an allowance yet still demanded that I keep up the chores.
So I kept up the chores.
Then NICELY asked my dad for money. I was LUCKY to get a little for gas and a phone card since i'm doing job interviews....Instead of just telling me that he didn't have any, he just drug it out in the worst possible horrible way about how this is was all my fault, how I'm wrong, that I'm not trying hard enough---HE LIED.
I don't trust him.
He betrayed me.
My parents had a meal ticket for the visa sponsor parasites- stupid projecting manipulative violent thuggie JERK!!!
Then! Then he had the NERVE to accuse me of low self esteem!
FUCK YOU DAD!!! MY SELF ESTEEM IS JUST FINE, THE IDIOTS WHO PUT ME DOWN IN MY TIME OF NEED REALLY NEED A SELF ESTEEM CHECK.
STUPID UGLY HIDEOUS GARBAGE TWEAKER TRASH ENTITLED THIEVING AMERICANS AND THEIR STUPID POLITICAL THEATRE, BULLY TACTICS- INFERIORITY COMPLEX...
JUST BECAUSE I WAS WRONGED DOESN'T MEAN MY SELF ESTEEM IS LACKING, BECAUSE UNLIKE YOU AND MOM - I WAS FORCED TO ACCOMPLISH THINGS FOR MYSELF AND EVERYTHING I EVER HAD WAS DONE BY ME ACCOMPLISHING WHAT I DID. Stupid twofaced bitch boy of white priveledge.
YOU'RE THE LOSER ASSCLOWN WHO HAS NOT ACCOMPLISHED SHIT!!!!!
Michelle- this lady they deal with for my mom's concessionaire- bad mouthed me to my mom when the garbage ugly stupid fat slut didn't do her own job.
Of course my traitor blood thirsty backstabbing baby beating bitch parents just took her word for it.
So I have no money and the jerks decided THEY were going to pick out my food since, like- you know they're not giving me money to buy my own. Protein Lunas pushed up my cholesterol and my weight. I'm stuck dodging high fructose corn syrup and hormone laden garbage in their cupboards. I just applied for food stamps. Maybe then I could afford some Pepto without going through that horrible episode.
My parents are the most two faced, violent thug creeps.
Sunday, June 28, 2015
So much for the nepotistic coked/methed out New Trade Theory Beneficiaries of white/affirmative action privelege at the expense of our fiscal deficit
Nope, bank
failures were not enough! Being robbed for TARP wasn't nearly enough.
The oil boom inspired meth epidemic didn't fix the U.S. economy!
Glad to see that robbing taxpayers for Ukraine Kiev NAZIs resulted in a race war and hatred towards cops in fear of a police state.
I'm so glad that the bank of revolving Uncle Sam enforced quality control!
Look at the U.S. Healthcare system, Obamacare/Affordable Care act did NOTHING to fix the dangerous conflicts of interest stemming from big pharma's bribes to doctors to push drugs instead of fixing people.
Glad to see the FDA, AMA and CDC embezzle government monies instead of doing their jobs.
Glad to see Affirmative Action fix EVERYTHING!
What's next? Elon Musk so arrogantly bragged about putting his fortune into Space X- the government put the U.S. Taxpayers into that nepotistic affirmative action junkie ecstatic wannabe money hole.
Now for some more epic and wonderful insights from the government sponsored MSM.
I never dreampt that ever in my life I would admit to being jealous of the Russians.
failures were not enough! Being robbed for TARP wasn't nearly enough.The oil boom inspired meth epidemic didn't fix the U.S. economy!
Glad to see that robbing taxpayers for Ukraine Kiev NAZIs resulted in a race war and hatred towards cops in fear of a police state.
I'm so glad that the bank
of revolving Uncle Sam enforced quality control!Look at the U.S. Healthcare
system, Obamacare/Affordable Care act did NOTHING to fix the dangerous conflicts of interest stemming from big pharma's bribes to doctors to push drugs instead of fixing people.Glad to see the FDA, AMA and CDC embezzle government monies instead of doing their jobs
.Glad to see Affirmative Action fix EVERYTHING!
What's next? Elon Musk so arrogantly bragged about putting his fortune into Space X- the government put the U.S. Taxpayers into that nepotistic affirmative action junkie ecstatic wannabe money hole.
SpaceX Falcon 9 supply rocket explodes minutes after launch
A SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket exploded minutes
The incident followed what was meant to be a routine cargo mission to the International Space Station.
"The vehicle
"We appear to have had a launch vehicle failure," Diller said. "At this point it is not clear to the launch team exactly what happened."
The live webcast of the launch went silent about three minutes into the flight
The California-based company's live webcast of the launch went silent about three minutes into the flight
Moments later, a SpaceX commentator said the video link from the vehicle had been lost. "There was some kind of anomaly during first stage flight
(AFP Photo)"However it appears something did occur during first stage operations," he added, referring to the stage of rocket flight before the cargo ship would have been able to separate from the first stage of the rocket and reach orbit.http://www.hindustantimes.com/world-news/jolt-to-nasa-as-spacex-rocket-explodes-after-launch/article1-1363813.aspx
Now for some more epic and wonderful insights from the government sponsored MSM.
I never dreampt that ever in my life I would admit to being jealous of the Russians.
Sunday, June 21, 2015
My "mean" post. Drugs.
Yesterday I was at the store in line where this sick, cachexic, rail thin black lady was having a conversation on her cell.
She was strikingly thin in a sea of obesity and junkies, she stands maybe 5'8 and might weigh as much as 90 pounds. There are some women who can look good as thin, but this lady wasn't thin. She was clearly starving for some reason.
So of course the first impression you might have of her is that she's a junkie.
The doctors were so nasty and they didn't want to deal with the hard stuff, but take my money anyways.
So now I have an agenda against these people.
The trouble with drugs is that the element attracts a lot of self loathing b* losers trying to be somebody important. And they never get over that self loathing p*$$y pant inferiority complex- not long enough to accomplish anything where they're allowed to feel good about themselves. I noticed A LOT of boomers are like this. My family has an element of this - without the hard illegal junk.
None of us have an answer for "Who You Is?"
She was strikingly thin in a sea of obesity and junkies, she stands maybe 5'8 and might weigh as much as 90 pounds. There are some women who can look good as thin, but this lady wasn't thin. She was clearly starving for some reason.
So of course the first impression you might have of her is that she's a junkie.
She was going on about cops this, Western Union that...and something about CANCER and how she's "supposed to take these pills to survive" (before her words were choked with tears). Even if it's possible that she's a junkie, and the white tweakertastic garbage have been draining resources with their self inflicted Hodgkin's Disease (bone/blood cancer).
The "breed" of store clerks in inland Socal were nicer to the rabid tweaker white lady who was going off on the pharmacist enforcing the rules to her percocet prescription.
I was stricken, not just by this black lady's unusually skeletal frame. But how she was treated.
When I was sick, I couldn't eat. I could barely drink water. My mom didn't come through for me.
Nobody to drive you when you're sick. But I couldn't be handled, I didn't know what my body was going to do next and I had to take care of everything. And I didn't let my dad. He was the one who had always helped me when I was sick.
Nobody to drive you when you're sick. But I couldn't be handled, I didn't know what my body was going to do next and I had to take care of everything. And I didn't let my dad. He was the one who had always helped me when I was sick.
The doctors were so nasty and they didn't want to deal with the hard stuff, but take my money anyways.
So now I have an agenda against these people.
The trouble with drugs is that the element attracts a lot of self loathing b* losers trying to be somebody important. And they never get over that self loathing p*$$y pant inferiority complex- not long enough to accomplish anything where they're allowed to feel good about themselves. I noticed A LOT of boomers are like this. My family has an element of this - without the hard illegal junk.
The inferiority complex ridden @$$bags shoot each other up for nothing, who thinks they're going to have not even bedside manners but common courtesy? For the elderly and the sick? Or for women?
This country went downhill WAY too fast. The only difference is that we have somewhat better technology and the majority of EWBs are fat, ugly with ugly tattoos and dressed like @$$clown maroons. Seriously, how can people so disgusting be so full of themselves?
These are middle aged adults.
This country went downhill WAY too fast. The only difference is that we have somewhat better technology and the majority of EWBs are fat, ugly with ugly tattoos and dressed like @$$clown maroons. Seriously, how can people so disgusting be so full of themselves?
These are middle aged adults.
None of us have an answer for "Who You Is?"
They're not just soulless, but ineptly clueless. And yes I blame the government for this. Who lets influence and incentive motives encourage people to not betray your spouses, but to have meal tickets instead of loved children? So the rest of us have to put up with this garbage AND comp reckless violent racist worthless trash it with our tax dollars.
AWESOME!!!
AWESOME!!!
Well anyways.
If I'm going to be mean.
DRUGSS!!! The almighty backstabbing useless wonders.
DRUGSS!!! The almighty backstabbing useless wonders.
I never went to any Coachellas, Burningmans or EDC. They're all in hot places and I haven't dealt too well with the heat. I find the attendees somewhat entertaining but as I got wiser- I found too many intolerably pretentious and irritating.
Again, whose quality controlling this junk called recreational mind candy?
The same people who are quality controlling the foods that we eat?
Back in Junior High, MY age group kind of came to terms with modesty. The more unattractive you are, the more skin you showed to get attention.
Back in Junior High, MY age group kind of came to terms with modesty. The more unattractive you are, the more skin you showed to get attention.
This was the Electric Daisy Carnival circa 2014, images courtesy of L.A. Weekly.
http://images1.laweekly.com/imager/the-fashion-of-electric-daisy-carnival-201/u/original/4805906/9833528.0.jpg
http://www.laweekly.com/slideshow/the-50-most-beautiful-people-at-edc-vegas-5712305/27
"Most Beautiful"= NOT!
http://www.laweekly.com/slideshow/the-50-most-beautiful-people-at-edc-vegas-5712305/27
"Most Beautiful"= NOT!
I know we were not perfect in the 1990's, but we were still NATURALLY thinner?
I literally lived at the pool, I was on a swim team, worked as a lifeguard and I still see more skin here.
In San Diego, the women would lower their cleavage at work as low as they can, and when the office temperatures dropped below 70 degrees, the freaks would crank up their space heaters at their desk.
So basically the warm temperatures is how girls are literally forced to dress to the skimpies so the guys don't have to pay for a date or a stripper club. You get what you pay for.
Not even that. There was a much easier energy. We ate real food (for a while). I'd NEVER thought I would say this, but the 80's were MODEST. Teased hair and perms, but real hair color. Bright colors, less make up? The guys too! LESS IS MORE! I mean less junk please. Simple is the best, you have your own character that comes out with you and not the ear holes, the tats, the anemia from hard drug use. And probably a bit more of a brain.
Meth is too often synonymous with Molly
Rats on Meth and Mollies (MDMA)
Poor rats on drugs:
Mollies = Meth (on the business side of things)
.
In San Diego, the women would lower their cleavage at work as low as they can, and when the office temperatures dropped below 70 degrees, the freaks would crank up their space heaters at their desk.
So basically the warm temperatures is how girls are literally forced to dress to the skimpies so the guys don't have to pay for a date or a stripper club. You get what you pay for.
Not even that. There was a much easier energy. We ate real food (for a while). I'd NEVER thought I would say this, but the 80's were MODEST. Teased hair and perms, but real hair color. Bright colors, less make up? The guys too! LESS IS MORE! I mean less junk please. Simple is the best, you have your own character that comes out with you and not the ear holes, the tats, the anemia from hard drug use. And probably a bit more of a brain.
Meth is too often synonymous with Molly
Rats on Meth and Mollies (MDMA)
Poor rats on drugs:
All treatments produced hyperactivity while the treatments where MDMA was administered first (MDMA, MDMA-->METH and MDMA/METH) produced hyperthermia. All treatments involving METH caused significant head weaving. Six weeks after drug treatment all groups showed reduced social interaction relative to controls. MDMA/METH treatment was associated with reduced swimming in the forced swim test. MDMA given alone caused 5-HT depletion in several brain regions while METH given alone caused dopamine depletion in the striatum. The three treatments involving MDMA and METH combinations caused significant depletion of serotonin, dopamine and noradrenaline in several brain regions. Interestingly, the MDMA-->METH treatment produced greater hippocampal and cortical 5-HT depletion than the METH-->MDMA treatment suggesting an effect of order. These results extend our recent findings of additive toxic effects when METH is combined with MDMA. This has potentially important implications for party drug users who appear to frequently use this combination. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15993443
Mollies = Meth (on the business side of things)
A short form of the word 'molecule,' molly is being marketed to teens and young adults as a 'pure' form of MDMA, what was once commonly referred to as 'ecstasy'. Youths who are new to the drug scene (and even avid drug users) are taking the dealers at their word.
And that terrifies me.
The DEA stated that only 13 per cent of 'molly' seized in New York State actually had any MDMA in it. And that 13 per cent wasn't 'pure' by any means. It had a mixture of other toxic chemicals including Methylone, MDPV, 4-MEC, 4-MMC, Pentedrone and MePP all mixed in with the MDMA.
I work with teenagers who are battling addiction and molly has essentially taken over my practice in the past few months. And many of the teens I work with take their dealer at their word when they are told that they are buying 'pure' MDMA.
Blame Madonna. Blame Miley. Blame whoever you want, but this one hundred-year-old drug is more popular now than it ever has been.
Ask any avid drug user the difference between 'molly' and 'ecstasy' and they will most likely tell you that 'molly is pure MDMA' and ecstasy was more known to be cut with other substances. In reality, this couldn't be further from the truth. And herein lies the problem.
Unless you are an accomplished chemist, 'pure' MDMA is a myth. Pure MDMA costs a lot of money and drug dealers are not in the business of losing money. On the other hand, meth is quite cheap, which is why it is one of the most common drugs found in molly.
"There's no good batch of molly, MDMA, or Ecstasy....you have no idea what's in this stuff. Dealers want to make more money, so they'll mix and adulterate the stuff with meth and any number of other drugs," according to Anthony Pettigrew, a spokesman for the New England division of the Drug Enforcement Agency.
Ask your average teenager if they would ever do meth and they will likely be shocked and appalled at the suggestion. But ask them about molly and you get a whole different answer. Even though many times they are the exact same thing.
We have a huge battle ahead of us and the first step is to end the myth about molly. It is not pure MDMA. It is not pure anything.
It is a potentially lethal cocktail of lab chemicals and household chemicals and every single trip is a dangerous game of Russian Roulette. http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/chris-curry/molly-drug_b_5425555.html
And what's the worst side effect from doing drugs? WEIGHT GAIN DURING REHAB!!!
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/09/15/addiction-recovery-weight-gain-nutrition/
.
Tuesday, June 16, 2015
HUGS NOT DRUGS!!! - Dedicated to the issues of drug abuse in the U.S.
I'm picking on the tweaker trend because it's overrun the U.S.
Oil boom brings on the tweaker trash.
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/04/12/dark-side-nd-oil-boom-meth-heroin-cartels-all-part-growing-drug-trade-1418696252/
Meth is a drug that binds the violent white supremacists.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2014/10/14/high-hitler-nazi-leader-was-a-crystal-meth-addict-says-new-documentary/
http://www.scribd.com/doc/246600799/White-Supremacist-Meth-Ring-Indictment
http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2014/11/thirty-seven-people-with-ties-to-white-supremacist-groups-arrested-for-running-north-texas-meth-distribution-ring.html/
In the U.S., it's both neonazis and Dixie nasty grossies and after a few hits- none of the details matter.
And Victoria Nuland and the garbage CIA robbed taxpayers of all races to finance Kiev NAZIS. Why?To antagonize Russia because increased supply in energy will drop oil prices- then the criminal banks can't get their petrodollar funded liquidty to push up real estate bubbles in a $h*T economy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIjEEFdnzkw
MARIETTA, GA (CBS46) -A couple is facing charges after their five children were found living in what authorities describe as “disgusting” conditions.
Dennis and Ashley Thomas are being charged with contributing to the deprivation of a minor. Their children, ages 1, 2, 3, 13 and 14, were found living inside the garage their father rents as a mechanic in Cobb County, which is just northwest of Atlanta.
According to police warrants, officials with the Department of Family and Child Services found the children with multiple insect bites, filthy clothing and said they had not bathed in days. Police also found only moldy food in the refrigerator and the bathroom covered in feces.
Dennis Thomas tells CBS46 it's all a misunderstanding. He says he reached out to DFCS in May, but was turned down for assistance.
“I asked them for help, begged them for help. 'We can't do nothing unless your kids are in danger.' That's what I was told,” says Thomas.
Thomas says the family had been living in a nearby motel, but he ran out of money to pay for the room or a babysitter. So he had no choice but to move them into the garage. He said they had been in the garage for five nights before authorities found them.
“Three of those nights, I actually stayed up all night working to try and get the money together to get somewhere with them,” says Thomas.
All five children are now in protective custody, according to Marietta Police Department.
Copyright 2015 WGCL-TV (Meredith Corporation). All rights reserved.http://www.cbs46.com/story/29327000/police-say-children-found-in-disgusting-conditions
http://www.jctnac.org/default.htm http://www.nydailynews.com/news/faces-meth-gallery-1.1214855?pmSlide=1.1214851
Monday, June 15, 2015
Ah, MOAR descriptions of the U.S. obesity epidemic
"The average American woman now weighs as much as the average 1960s man
The average American woman weighs 166.2 pounds, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. As reddit recently pointed out, that's almost exactly as much as the average American man weighed in the early 1960s.
Men, you're not looking too hot in this scenario either. Over the same time period you gained nearly 30 pounds, from 166.3 in the 60s to 195.5 today. Doing the same comparison as above, today's American man weighs almost as much as 1.5 American women from the 1960s. At 195.5 pounds, put five American guys in aROOMand you've gathered roughly half a ton of manhood...."
"...ACCORDING
The average American is 33 pounds heavier than the average Frenchman, 40 pounds heavier than the average Japanese citizen, and a whopping 70 pounds heavier than the average citizen of Bangladesh. To add up to one ton of total mass, it takes 20 Bangladeshis but only 12.2 Americans.
Together, the world's adult human beings added up to 287 million tons of biomass in 2005,ACCORDING
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2015/06/12/look-at-how-much-weight-weve-gained-since-the-1960s/?tid=sm_fb
Everytime I look back at my high school peers in the Midwest- God help some because they were really trying. But it is so disgusting.
This is making me want to run, I'm still down with cramps and I didn't eat much today? But I need to get back out there.
The part where this pisses me off is that Americans so arrogantly don't bother with quality control, they negatively enforce the lack of quality control because they want the government agencies to fix everything with this entitlement mentality.
Obviously, it doesn't work like that.
Sunday, June 14, 2015
Why Affirmative Action? LOSERS SUCK says the overrepresented minority clause
Asian scores on the 2013 STAR exams in Algebra and integrated math gravitated towards the top.
Blacks' scores gravitated towards the center, or "average".
Whites scored barely a hair above latinos at the bottom of the scale.
Whites are failing themselves and they're punishing Asians for it with the overrepresented minority clause. This doesn't come as a surprise as I've heard that whites do A LOT of drugs in the schools here. With latinos.
I'm not sure about blacks, I have seen black FATHERS take their kids out and discipline them with sports training. They're actually a lot nicer (and less criminal) in LA than latinos. Yes there's going to be a population that does drugs and commits crimes and this isn't condoning that. But you have someone who might be benefitting from simply doing the right thing.
Whites here take out equity lines on overpriced real estate they can't afford in "nice" neighborhoods to buy wasteful gas guzzling SUVs, vanity things (whitening teeth, nail salon, hair salon, etc.) and end up in bankruptcy, foreclosures and divorce court.
Asians unfortunately do the same, without the divorce thingie.
But we can see why whites and latinos don't concentrate on school. Ego and drugs.
Asian STAR scores 2013 - most percentage in this group weighed most at the top.
http://star.cde.ca.gov/star2013/ViewReport.aspx?ps=true&lstTestYear=2013&lstTestType=C&lstCounty=&lstDistrict=&lstSchool=&lstGroup=5&lstSubGroup=76
Blacks STAR scores 2013- more than 30% of sophomores and juniors performed less than basic on math/algebra scores.
http://star.cde.ca.gov/star2013/ViewReport.aspx?ps=true&lstTestYear=2013&lstTestType=C&lstCounty=&lstDistrict=&lstSchool=&lstGroup=5&lstSubGroup=74
Over 40% of Hispanics scored less than basic proficiency on the STAR 2013 exams.
And language is no excuse. I've had Ohio State Calculus TAs teach us College Business Algebra through numbers only as he spoke fluent Japanese and understood absolutely no English (we had to pass the exams anyways).
http://star.cde.ca.gov/star2013/ViewReport.aspx?ps=true&lstTestYear=2013&lstTestType=C&lstCounty=&lstDistrict=&lstSchool=&lstGroup=5&lstSubGroup=78
Caucasians are scoring WITH Hispanics. Juniors in high school are 40% BELOW PROFICIENCY at integrated math and algebra.
http://star.cde.ca.gov/star2013/ViewReport.aspx?ps=true&lstTestYear=2013&lstTestType=C&lstCounty=&lstDistrict=&lstSchool=&lstGroup=5&lstSubGroup=80
I can't even to Smart and Final to comparison shop and purchase veggies without garbage white racist tweakertrash nasties making problems.
I can't even tell you how much I hate the U.S. and ugly stupid NASTY Americans.
My family treats me like I'm worthless but they're the assholes who were stupid enough to bring me into the world. Oh wait, yeah meal ticket.
Then the white trash caste system of kleptouglies and LOSERS.
There was no scratches, there was no injuries, dents, no damage- they were demanding my insurance information and the asshole used his Rawlings Mechanical truck locking me in the parking space.
I refused to give it to them.
I offered to pull my car out and to remedy the problem.
The tweaker trash kept yelling and screaming at me, in humid 100 degree weather and not allowing me to move my car at all.
Why am I allowed to be treated like a god damned second class citizen when I did nothing wrong, I hurt nobody... The next time there will be a fucking bullet in somebody's head.
This is NOT okay.
This is NOT acceptable.
The U.S. is NOTHING but white trash and stupid thieving morbidly obese ecstatic wannabe. The other group is normal black people and LEGAL immigrants.
Sunday, June 7, 2015
Why I'm frustrated with people.
When you do the right things, it works in your favor. If it doesn't show up on the outside, you'll see the results on your blood work.
I'm not a healthnut.
However I've done enough of the right things to where it should be easy for doctors to pinpoint what is causing some unnecessary health situations in my body and they won't do it because they're corrupt.
This is how stupid and ugly fat and nasty racist thrive on negativity Americans are.
Look, in Japan- they use personal responsibility is the invisible hand that quality controlled their healthcare and their healthcare is not considered a money maker.
All they do is eat real FRESH food and stay active. In other words, nothing special really. I used to live there, nobody was making a fuss about it.
That way, their healthcare sector is not considered a money maker with retained earnings to bribe lawmakers and government agencies to get them off the hook for pulling garbage. This is why Japan's healthcare is the cheapest in the world.
By the way, Japan's centurions are smokers.
Americans are STUPID!!!!
Here's what boomer fiscal/voting majority are saying, "I paid my life into medicare, the doctors will take care of me"... after they shove their faces into a pile of hormones and high fructose corn syrup ridden 2500 calorie meals.
Then brag about the side effects for their $500 statins, $800 blood thinners, stints and so forth instead of using personal responsibility to clear up any mis-findings. Then FEAR and pain is used to push the lowest quality of treatment possible for the most amount of money. It's called a "MUGGING".
But they won't. Americans are so arrogant in their stupidity.
And drugs. The almighty inferiority complex ridden "vice" trend that started with Baby Boomers and became pushed into the seeds of society through negative social reinforcement.
What message are you giving to Big Pharma and Big Agra when you give your hard earned money at a sociopathic drug dealer handling your chemical cocktails? Knowing that Pfeizer and Monsanto have merged.
WHO IS PULLING QUALITY CONTROL?!!!!
ME. That's it. Seriously. I'm the ONLY one that has ever figured out that high insulin, not high glucose causes PCOS? No, a few research teams know.
I'm by myself.
ALL ALONE.
IN PAIN.
IN FINANCIAL HARDSHIP..
Battling big pharma special interest and their bought off doctors, nurses their PR Trolls, the insurance companies, the FDA, the AMA and the CDC.
Please allow me to explain my own point of view:
I'm a minority that might be confused for someone who gets confused with English when I'm obviously speaking it fluently. I'm also perceived as "obedient", "submissive", etc.
By a hated minority group that outperformed in an underachieving state and country with entitlement issues, bullying behavior and pseudo power trips.
Fine.
THEN! Comes more prejudice in the form of misogyny. This is where it's ingrained in my own family. Mind you, my dad punishes me for everything he hates in "spoiled white women" and I have an endocrine issue that they want to dismiss as a contact disease to blame the victim because this is too scary for them.
"Feminists" are the worst misogynists around. Misogynists specialize in the art of mugging women with these conditions.
I had to deal with:
-financial hardship due to the economy and unemployment. I'm tackling stomach flu symptoms while doing job interviews because I badly need a job.
MY LIFE NEEDS ME.
-Idiot psychotic draft dodging family members who tried to throw me away in a garbage baby boomer's oil war.
-Racism. Including nasty tweaker trash.
-High crime rate.
-The usual business of self loathing peers, cattiness, relationship strains...
-A history of being abused as a child and being bullied/snubbed from racism.
-I worked to get myself an education, salary paying job- to fend for myself so the ugly nasty racist garbage stupid loser baby boomer voting majority kleptocrats can completely fuck me over on trade deficits with the world, hyperinflation, high violent crime rate due to their drug use, violation of use of everyone's tax dollars on hate groups and terror cells- and a very malicious, corrupt government with a monopoly of power. I have cramps, I have to do the hard stuff AND put up with that.
Mentally I already fell apart.
There is nothing in the world worth this bullshit. I didn't do drugs, I'm not reckless or promiscuous.
I treated people well. Fuck this.
I don't know why I'm supposed to bring life into the world if the world couldn't handle me for WHAT I am. I can't afford kids.
I told my mother this on my 40th birthday. I'm 40. After the hell I went though BEFORE being sick- nothing came of it but even more pain and suffering.
So she proceeded to physically attack me.
I already told her that high fructose corn syrup raises triglycerides. Of course the baby beating bitch didn't listen to me. She'd rather choke on that, take her HRTs that caused idiot's triglycerides to go up to cause stupid her angina in the first place. Now on top of the food triglyceride spikers, she's doing more xeno-estrogens.
She cried about people being ungrateful- which is bullshit. Anytime ANYONE tried to do something nice, she either called it "junky" and threw it away - OR! she would give it away to someone else.
Then the real world. I see what the hormones, hfcs, crud and so forth did to Americans.
Caucasians Americans to me were never that attractive. Mind you, I was born and semi-raised in Asia where it's normal for people to not be sick and obese.
Meth isn't helping. Crack, cocaine- it may get a few people very skinny but it doesn't work for the majority. Then the pills taken to help people combat "bi-polar" is really rehab for drug addicts and they cause mack daddy weight gain, when addictions should be cured by shutting off ghrelin (CART and NPY-Y5r are peptides directly responsible for cocaine addiction).
This was never my problem but the garbage baby boomers forced ALL of this on my shoulders with their policies and such.
I never asked to be a citizen of the U.S. I didn't ask to be born either.
The U.S. is too selfish at the top, agenda ridden, disabling and arrogant to be fixed on any level.
We don't need WWIII to take the U.S. down. Rome fell from within.
I'm not a healthnut.
However I've done enough of the right things to where it should be easy for doctors to pinpoint what is causing some unnecessary health situations in my body and they won't do it because they're corrupt.
This is how stupid and ugly fat and nasty racist thrive on negativity Americans are.
Look, in Japan- they use personal responsibility is the invisible hand that quality controlled their healthcare and their healthcare is not considered a money maker.
All they do is eat real FRESH food and stay active. In other words, nothing special really. I used to live there, nobody was making a fuss about it.
That way, their healthcare sector is not considered a money maker with retained earnings to bribe lawmakers and government agencies to get them off the hook for pulling garbage. This is why Japan's healthcare is the cheapest in the world.
By the way, Japan's centurions are smokers.
Americans are STUPID!!!!
Here's what boomer fiscal/voting majority are saying, "I paid my life into medicare, the doctors will take care of me"... after they shove their faces into a pile of hormones and high fructose corn syrup ridden 2500 calorie meals.
Then brag about the side effects for their $500 statins, $800 blood thinners, stints and so forth instead of using personal responsibility to clear up any mis-findings. Then FEAR and pain is used to push the lowest quality of treatment possible for the most amount of money. It's called a "MUGGING".
But they won't. Americans are so arrogant in their stupidity.
And drugs. The almighty inferiority complex ridden "vice" trend that started with Baby Boomers and became pushed into the seeds of society through negative social reinforcement.
What message are you giving to Big Pharma and Big Agra when you give your hard earned money at a sociopathic drug dealer handling your chemical cocktails? Knowing that Pfeizer and Monsanto have merged.
WHO IS PULLING QUALITY CONTROL?!!!!
ME. That's it. Seriously. I'm the ONLY one that has ever figured out that high insulin, not high glucose causes PCOS? No, a few research teams know.
I'm by myself.
ALL ALONE.
IN PAIN.
IN FINANCIAL HARDSHIP..
Battling big pharma special interest and their bought off doctors, nurses their PR Trolls, the insurance companies, the FDA, the AMA and the CDC.
Please allow me to explain my own point of view:
I'm a minority that might be confused for someone who gets confused with English when I'm obviously speaking it fluently. I'm also perceived as "obedient", "submissive", etc.
By a hated minority group that outperformed in an underachieving state and country with entitlement issues, bullying behavior and pseudo power trips.
Fine.
THEN! Comes more prejudice in the form of misogyny. This is where it's ingrained in my own family. Mind you, my dad punishes me for everything he hates in "spoiled white women" and I have an endocrine issue that they want to dismiss as a contact disease to blame the victim because this is too scary for them.
"Feminists" are the worst misogynists around. Misogynists specialize in the art of mugging women with these conditions.
I had to deal with:
-financial hardship due to the economy and unemployment. I'm tackling stomach flu symptoms while doing job interviews because I badly need a job.
MY LIFE NEEDS ME.
-Idiot psychotic draft dodging family members who tried to throw me away in a garbage baby boomer's oil war.
-Racism. Including nasty tweaker trash.
-High crime rate.
-The usual business of self loathing peers, cattiness, relationship strains...
-A history of being abused as a child and being bullied/snubbed from racism.
-I worked to get myself an education, salary paying job- to fend for myself so the ugly nasty racist garbage stupid loser baby boomer voting majority kleptocrats can completely fuck me over on trade deficits with the world, hyperinflation, high violent crime rate due to their drug use, violation of use of everyone's tax dollars on hate groups and terror cells- and a very malicious, corrupt government with a monopoly of power. I have cramps, I have to do the hard stuff AND put up with that.
Mentally I already fell apart.
There is nothing in the world worth this bullshit. I didn't do drugs, I'm not reckless or promiscuous.
I treated people well. Fuck this.
I don't know why I'm supposed to bring life into the world if the world couldn't handle me for WHAT I am. I can't afford kids.
I told my mother this on my 40th birthday. I'm 40. After the hell I went though BEFORE being sick- nothing came of it but even more pain and suffering.
So she proceeded to physically attack me.
I already told her that high fructose corn syrup raises triglycerides. Of course the baby beating bitch didn't listen to me. She'd rather choke on that, take her HRTs that caused idiot's triglycerides to go up to cause stupid her angina in the first place. Now on top of the food triglyceride spikers, she's doing more xeno-estrogens.
She cried about people being ungrateful- which is bullshit. Anytime ANYONE tried to do something nice, she either called it "junky" and threw it away - OR! she would give it away to someone else.
Then the real world. I see what the hormones, hfcs, crud and so forth did to Americans.
Caucasians Americans to me were never that attractive. Mind you, I was born and semi-raised in Asia where it's normal for people to not be sick and obese.
Meth isn't helping. Crack, cocaine- it may get a few people very skinny but it doesn't work for the majority. Then the pills taken to help people combat "bi-polar" is really rehab for drug addicts and they cause mack daddy weight gain, when addictions should be cured by shutting off ghrelin (CART and NPY-Y5r are peptides directly responsible for cocaine addiction).
This was never my problem but the garbage baby boomers forced ALL of this on my shoulders with their policies and such.
I never asked to be a citizen of the U.S. I didn't ask to be born either.
The U.S. is too selfish at the top, agenda ridden, disabling and arrogant to be fixed on any level.
We don't need WWIII to take the U.S. down. Rome fell from within.
Wednesday, June 3, 2015
The world as I knew it just isn't as good as it used to be
Once upon a time, it was thank God for aesthetics, fashion and art.
Something horrid took over and it's all junk. Don't blame Asia, they still see straight sober.
I know we're all getting older. I'd rather see bland "middle aged" adults with common sensibilities who are sober and at least somewhat healthy. Or trying to be or stay healthy. Maybe with some character, aesthetics (no matter how played down), charm, kindness-sometimes regular stuff.
Rather than:
-Morbid extreme obesity
-big beards
-tats
-drugs
I'm trying to get my head in a good place to get through a meeting.
Not only is this distracting, I already don't feel great and there's not enough you can say about serotonin.
But whatever I need to finish this blog. I'm blogging because I need to let some thoughts out.
Like, why was I taken out of Asia and forced to suffer discrimination? What the FUCK were my parents thinking? OMG.
In the past, people acted as if I had to "go up" to their level to impress them or something like that- when that snobbery was basically racism (on top of "class" warfare at a white trash school).
Fast forward, the NORMAL kids were outpacing the egomaniacs, unfortunately I couldn't be with them because I didn't have access to the same revolving line of credit with bank of mom and dad that they had access to, so technically I accomplished more than they did. Especially for what I had access to.
But anyways.
These "snobs".
Something horrid took over and it's all junk. Don't blame Asia, they still see straight sober.
I know we're all getting older. I'd rather see bland "middle aged" adults with common sensibilities who are sober and at least somewhat healthy. Or trying to be or stay healthy. Maybe with some character, aesthetics (no matter how played down), charm, kindness-sometimes regular stuff.
Rather than:
-Morbid extreme obesity
-big beards
-tats
-drugs
I'm trying to get my head in a good place to get through a meeting.
Not only is this distracting, I already don't feel great and there's not enough you can say about serotonin.
But whatever I need to finish this blog. I'm blogging because I need to let some thoughts out.
Like, why was I taken out of Asia and forced to suffer discrimination? What the FUCK were my parents thinking? OMG.
In the past, people acted as if I had to "go up" to their level to impress them or something like that- when that snobbery was basically racism (on top of "class" warfare at a white trash school).
Fast forward, the NORMAL kids were outpacing the egomaniacs, unfortunately I couldn't be with them because I didn't have access to the same revolving line of credit with bank of mom and dad that they had access to, so technically I accomplished more than they did. Especially for what I had access to.
But anyways.
These "snobs".
Friday, May 15, 2015
Antagonism and prejudice is a false ideologue. It fixes nothing.
I'm the target of my dad's hostilities. I'm not a big woman, I don't do steroids, I'm not a welfare receiving baby momma, I don't do drugs, I didn't get into the Army because I was sick.
I put myself through school, I'm not abusing the system, I'm a decent person. I'm not rich, but being well off is obviously a threat to my parents and the boomer kleptocracy.
So I'm trying my best to control my cramps. I ate a few bites this morning, the cramps are coming on strong and my stomach isn't what it used to be. Even if I really wanted to, I can't engage in drama. Especially since thuggery is legal and widespread. I'm not feeling well, but I would be strong enough to hurt someone because they're getting older.
I didn't fight back physically.
My parents have been intolerant, conditionally accepting and basically outside of money- pretty rough.
They have always been like this. My dad takes his prejudice of spoiled young women out on me. The world isn't my fault, I can't change whatever triggered his inhibitions so it's really stupid to generalize to begin with.
He barked at me yesterday about a few minor things. This is the first time he spoke to me in a few weeks. I can tell that he tried to inflict harm on me a few times, potentially dangerous. I said proteins make my cholesterol go up, he fed me proteins. My parents are big enough idiots with their own health. Entitlements and egos are all they care about. "Arrogance" is the trendier word for stupidity.
I think my mom was sick this morning. She eats healthier foods but screws it up with hfcs, which will keep her triglycerides elevated. I told her this, she won't believe it until the doctors tell her.
And that's not going to happen. Her triglycerides spiked when she was on HRT, so now after we went through over a decade of her surviving angina, she's using estrogen replacement therapy.
My dad is on steroids. Yes moody bitch boy is a roid rager now! He's also on diabetes medication.
And he takes niacin. And he's doing Adkins I believe.
If he doesn't get it, he's due for heart disease. My mom isn't doing any better.
IF not now, the summer heat plus dehydration brings a high risk of insulin spikes which is going to push up LDL.
I can hear the boomers now,
They both haven't been taking their Xanax.
I put myself through school, I'm not abusing the system, I'm a decent person. I'm not rich, but being well off is obviously a threat to my parents and the boomer kleptocracy.
So I'm trying my best to control my cramps. I ate a few bites this morning, the cramps are coming on strong and my stomach isn't what it used to be. Even if I really wanted to, I can't engage in drama. Especially since thuggery is legal and widespread. I'm not feeling well, but I would be strong enough to hurt someone because they're getting older.
I didn't fight back physically.
My parents have been intolerant, conditionally accepting and basically outside of money- pretty rough.
They have always been like this. My dad takes his prejudice of spoiled young women out on me. The world isn't my fault, I can't change whatever triggered his inhibitions so it's really stupid to generalize to begin with.
He barked at me yesterday about a few minor things. This is the first time he spoke to me in a few weeks. I can tell that he tried to inflict harm on me a few times, potentially dangerous. I said proteins make my cholesterol go up, he fed me proteins. My parents are big enough idiots with their own health. Entitlements and egos are all they care about. "Arrogance" is the trendier word for stupidity.
I think my mom was sick this morning. She eats healthier foods but screws it up with hfcs, which will keep her triglycerides elevated. I told her this, she won't believe it until the doctors tell her.
And that's not going to happen. Her triglycerides spiked when she was on HRT, so now after we went through over a decade of her surviving angina, she's using estrogen replacement therapy.
My dad is on steroids. Yes moody bitch boy is a roid rager now! He's also on diabetes medication.
And he takes niacin. And he's doing Adkins I believe.
If he doesn't get it, he's due for heart disease. My mom isn't doing any better.
IF not now, the summer heat plus dehydration brings a high risk of insulin spikes which is going to push up LDL.
" Exposing 3T3-L1 adipocytes to physiologically relevant doses of hyperinsulinemia (250pM–5000pM) induced a dose-dependent gain in the mRNA/protein levels of 3-hydroxy-3-methyl-glutaryl-coenzyme A reductase (HMGR). These elevations were associated with elevated plasma membrane cholesterol. Mechanistically, hyperinsulinemia increased glucose flux through the HBP and O-linked β-N-acetylglucosamine (O-GlcNAc) modification of specificity protein 1 (Sp1), known to activate cholesterolgenic gene products such as the sterol response element-binding protein (SREBP1) and HMGR. Chromatin immunoprecipitation demonstrated that increased O-GlcNAc modification of Sp1 resulted in a higher binding affinity of Sp1 to the promoter regions of SREBP1 and HMGR. "http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3589672/
I can hear the boomers now,
"I paid my entire life into the medicare system, the doctors will take care of me".
They both haven't been taking their Xanax.
Reality Check - Racism thrives in the U.S. courtesy of rampant vile discrimination for the benefits of white privelege
Yesterday my memories were triggered when I found out that not only did classmates go into the finance sector after finding out that I passed the Series 7, but I'm being shown that white privilege still dominates and will fuck up everything. By the way, I was the only one who worked hard enough to pass the exam, they didn't.
The Asians I got to work with drove themselves hard, as the only Asians I saw in the field were serious overachievers. I'm talking about 98% on the Series 7, (others have a level 3 chartered CFA), CPAs, Masters in Accounting. This is totally different animal than the peers of white privilege that I went to high school with.
One is a girl who went to school for teaching. She's not the sharpest tool in the shed, she is pretty and popular though. She's one of the nicer ones in a racist state. Somehow shes' in management at Deloitte when I know Indian AMERICANS with high creds in accounting who were laid off from there.
Two brothers we know from high school, one was able to use his connections to build books. His not-so-high-achieving brother got a job at UBS. I can't get UBS to look at my resume.
My sister dated him, she would've treated me like the enemy even though I am more qualified for his job. The only Asian I know who worked there (outside of the CFAs) had a series 7, multilingual overachiever.
The only Asian in management at the low level trading firm I worked at scored a 98% on her Series 7. I passed that exam before my "people skills" sniveling b* boy boss from misogynist military did.
Last brief comparison.
One Asian girl I know scored a fantastic job out of college with a Masters in Software Engineering and a 4.3 GPA. She didn't once complain about physics or calculus. She complained about RACISM.
White kid with the same opportunity- average student in a frat at UofM with connections to 6 figure SVP job at NBC.
Nepotism rules.
The Asians I got to work with drove themselves hard, as the only Asians I saw in the field were serious overachievers. I'm talking about 98% on the Series 7, (others have a level 3 chartered CFA), CPAs, Masters in Accounting. This is totally different animal than the peers of white privilege that I went to high school with.
One is a girl who went to school for teaching. She's not the sharpest tool in the shed, she is pretty and popular though. She's one of the nicer ones in a racist state. Somehow shes' in management at Deloitte when I know Indian AMERICANS with high creds in accounting who were laid off from there.
Two brothers we know from high school, one was able to use his connections to build books. His not-so-high-achieving brother got a job at UBS. I can't get UBS to look at my resume.
My sister dated him, she would've treated me like the enemy even though I am more qualified for his job. The only Asian I know who worked there (outside of the CFAs) had a series 7, multilingual overachiever.
The only Asian in management at the low level trading firm I worked at scored a 98% on her Series 7. I passed that exam before my "people skills" sniveling b* boy boss from misogynist military did.
Last brief comparison.
One Asian girl I know scored a fantastic job out of college with a Masters in Software Engineering and a 4.3 GPA. She didn't once complain about physics or calculus. She complained about RACISM.
White kid with the same opportunity- average student in a frat at UofM with connections to 6 figure SVP job at NBC.
Nepotism rules.
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Kaleidoscopes, haunted house mirrors, illusions and then reality sets in. It was never good, It's never going to work out. It wasn't meant to work out.
The U.S. is a living nightmare. EVERYTHING is entirely fucked way up and it's-REAL! It's not just the fact that I live in California. People are expected to knife each other to stay afloat?
My life is already horrible. I'm not a preferred minority, my violent family has only bore me to beat me- I was not able to get a decent wage job AND I've been sick! With not even mercy from my ugly horrible violent self loathing backstabbing family.
As a kid, I remember walking into the room where my parents were watching a VHS movie similar to "Mommy Dearest" and my dad was sitting up self-righteously saying how he liked to watch the young girl get beaten down because she's a spoilt bitch. This is the prejudice he held against me.
Speaking of which, I made a grave mistake and conversed with him that certain proteins pushed up my LDL. So being that I'm at his mercy until I find a real wage paying job, he bought me protein Luna bars. That's the only change in my diet, of course my cholesterol and weight were both back up when I was checked over a week ago.
Moving out is only going to pose the same amount of violence that my family imposed on me? In the dangerous hood that I lose my badly needed money during racist discriminatory stagflation circa 2015.
Why do white people insist that I'm a violent thug only because I'm a minority? I'm ashamed that the Koreans bought into it, my stupid parents are bad enough.
I HATE VIOLENCE!!!!!
MOST VIOLENCE IS FOR INEPT STUPID LOSERS ANYWAYS- NOT SELF DEFENSE THAT i WAS NEVER ENTITLED TO.
It wears you thin. You get so sick of looking at crackheads, methheads, racists, junkie, the preventably morbidly obese, cheap heavy eyeliner, slutty gross clothing on gross people with ugly nasty tattoos, bullies, thugs and ill people. This isn't caused by a lack of money, although a lack of money can aggravate it. People are stupid enough to hate themselves which is why they let this happen to them.
After my nasty wretched violent rabid excuse for a mother physically attacked me on my birthday, I was inundated with flaming about Mothers' Day on Facebook? And everywhere I turn around. It was worse than the worst acid trips you can get.
I was just blocked from Facebook for expressing my true feelings about Asian elders.
No. My mother physically attacked me on my birthday when I told her it wasn't worth it.
And it's not.
My dad said that I'm not wanted. I had to move back after a 3 day temp assignment that was supposed to go on for 2 months-and I have nothing lined up. That temp job was through Direct Relief International. They "help" aka. exploit other countries including Mexico? But fuck over people in the U.S. when we're in a position of need. data.bls.gov/timeseries/LNS15000000
Now he's avoiding me and going out of his way to show that I'm not welcomed or wanted.
Let's see, he's the sycophant and the people he sucks up to get their kids jobs. I'm serious. He only tried to throw me away. No he doesn't do drugs. His mom was a real nasty lady, and he picked up that nerve to act like a witch.
Society has to stop treating people as if family is the only way to get by.
I wasn't the only one who was abused by family-there are worse cases. And of course, the parents all did drugs.
The government gives tax dollars to people and does not protect them?
Of course, 58 pound son the druggie mom burned stole his social security checks.
http://nypost.com/2015/05/13/mom-accused-of-burning-58-pound-adult-son-also-stole-his-checks-police/?utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=NYPFacebook&utm_medium=SocialFlow
In this case, my dad would've said, "he's an adult and he should fend for himself. Go join the military".
Here's another...from Daddy's hometown.
40 pound woman Cerebral palsy again. And guess what. The caretaker mom does drugs. I'm sure the caretaker used the social security money to get the drugs. And the stupid psycho cops deny this is a homicide of course.
http://www.utsandiego.com/news/2015/may/07/body-suitcase-lakeside-homicide-macbeth/
My life is already horrible. I'm not a preferred minority, my violent family has only bore me to beat me- I was not able to get a decent wage job AND I've been sick! With not even mercy from my ugly horrible violent self loathing backstabbing family.
As a kid, I remember walking into the room where my parents were watching a VHS movie similar to "Mommy Dearest" and my dad was sitting up self-righteously saying how he liked to watch the young girl get beaten down because she's a spoilt bitch. This is the prejudice he held against me.
Speaking of which, I made a grave mistake and conversed with him that certain proteins pushed up my LDL. So being that I'm at his mercy until I find a real wage paying job, he bought me protein Luna bars. That's the only change in my diet, of course my cholesterol and weight were both back up when I was checked over a week ago.
Moving out is only going to pose the same amount of violence that my family imposed on me? In the dangerous hood that I lose my badly needed money during racist discriminatory stagflation circa 2015.
Why do white people insist that I'm a violent thug only because I'm a minority? I'm ashamed that the Koreans bought into it, my stupid parents are bad enough.
I HATE VIOLENCE!!!!!
MOST VIOLENCE IS FOR INEPT STUPID LOSERS ANYWAYS- NOT SELF DEFENSE THAT i WAS NEVER ENTITLED TO.
It wears you thin. You get so sick of looking at crackheads, methheads, racists, junkie, the preventably morbidly obese, cheap heavy eyeliner, slutty gross clothing on gross people with ugly nasty tattoos, bullies, thugs and ill people. This isn't caused by a lack of money, although a lack of money can aggravate it. People are stupid enough to hate themselves which is why they let this happen to them.
After my nasty wretched violent rabid excuse for a mother physically attacked me on my birthday, I was inundated with flaming about Mothers' Day on Facebook? And everywhere I turn around. It was worse than the worst acid trips you can get.
I was just blocked from Facebook for expressing my true feelings about Asian elders.
No. My mother physically attacked me on my birthday when I told her it wasn't worth it.
And it's not.
My dad said that I'm not wanted. I had to move back after a 3 day temp assignment that was supposed to go on for 2 months-and I have nothing lined up. That temp job was through Direct Relief International. They "help" aka. exploit other countries including Mexico? But fuck over people in the U.S. when we're in a position of need. data.bls.gov/timeseries/LNS15000000
Now he's avoiding me and going out of his way to show that I'm not welcomed or wanted.
Let's see, he's the sycophant and the people he sucks up to get their kids jobs. I'm serious. He only tried to throw me away. No he doesn't do drugs. His mom was a real nasty lady, and he picked up that nerve to act like a witch.
Society has to stop treating people as if family is the only way to get by.
I wasn't the only one who was abused by family-there are worse cases. And of course, the parents all did drugs.
The government gives tax dollars to people and does not protect them?
Of course, 58 pound son the druggie mom burned stole his social security checks.
http://nypost.com/2015/05/13/mom-accused-of-burning-58-pound-adult-son-also-stole-his-checks-police/?utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=NYPFacebook&utm_medium=SocialFlow
In this case, my dad would've said, "he's an adult and he should fend for himself. Go join the military".
Here's another...from Daddy's hometown.
40 pound woman Cerebral palsy again. And guess what. The caretaker mom does drugs. I'm sure the caretaker used the social security money to get the drugs. And the stupid psycho cops deny this is a homicide of course.
http://www.utsandiego.com/news/2015/may/07/body-suitcase-lakeside-homicide-macbeth/
Sunday, April 19, 2015
dovete prendere le opportunità quando vengono
When opportunities arise, you have to take advantage of them.
You cannot wait for the approval of others for you to exist. You already do.
You don't have the "luxury" to miss the opportunity to thrive.
It's YOUR chance and it will be you who is stuck with the rewards or consequences of your actions.
Not those who demand or expect you to gain their permission to do something.
This has to be your own decision.
Opportunities don't wait, they dissipate like the mist.
Time fleets on.
Time does not change people. People have to make their decisions regardless.
Later, when people question you - actions speak louder, VOLUMES louder than words.
If you dated the right person because you took the opportunity.
If you passed the exam, won the race, got yourself through college, got the job, got the promotion, get healthy and fit-
Those who expect you to get their permission don't have enough to compensate for "opportunity costs". They don't have the ability to grant you any more time that you lost accommodating THEIR inhibitions.
If they are intimidated, they have to figure it out. You are not the cause of their problems, therefore it is not your responsibility to fix it and it would be stupid for anyone to hurt others expecting it to solve their problems.
People have gone through entire lifetimes and centuries without fixing problems and nothing gets better. So obviously the "punishment" is a nasty unnecessary power trip.
People confuse thriving on negativity for power.
They have to chose to fix the problem.
If they impose undesirable consequences on others which is not going to fix their problems, what's the prize? For either party?
And you.
When someone says, "why didn't you take that class?"
Why didn't you apply for that position?
It only reflects on you, not the "influence" who used social power that you voluntarily gave to them to make your decisions for you.
On the contrary. don't wait for things to happen to you. They say, "good things come in time".
This quote is missing the quintessential, "the ball has to be rolling somewhere in the right direction for good things to happen".
I personally find the Manifest Destiny people to be hyperarrogant assholes with a complex and the insane desire to condescend for a power trip.
Back during my first job out of college, the team lead had repercussions with a brain tumor he eventually lost his battle to. He was getting on my case about being a "health nut" because he had to be (according to what the "status quo" accepts as good information-is something I contradict but I'll get to that tangent one of these days)....he did all of the right things and he still, unfortunately lost his battle to cancer maybe a year or two later. Did he deserve it? NO. The punishment didn't fit the crime.
What sucks about this is that people don't judge on what they do but only the results. It's SUPPOSED to work out, but it doesn't. In order to be a legit judge of character, people need to consider the decisions, insight, actions, objective and situation. It's too hard for the negative people.
Also, it is not a shame to indulge in the rewards alone. That part confused me. I thought people would celebrate my success for the trouble I was caused. Oh, I was so wrong- they were not there when I needed them- they were not there when I needed someone to celebrate with. What was even more disappointing is that the people who posed as confident, self assured, "true blue" pals are actors. They are not confident.
Case in point. After I got my degree and some creds- others from high school(WHO CAME FROM MUCH MORE THAN WHAT I HAD) decided only then to go after their Masters. I can't afford to go after my masters. Envy is their only motivation. These are the people I supported as a friend or peer but they were not there for me. None of them were. I don't know that I was ever a threat to them or when it happened. I had to take my chances. They chose not to.
If I didn't take myself out to Malibu yesterday- nobody would've taken me. Those who would - they were able to go home back east. My family's roots are in California.
One friend was nice enough to treat me to Starbucks. I like Starbucks and Turkish coffee. I'm treated better when I'm courted. People wonder why some of us are not "loyal". Loyalty is a two way street.
I NEED to get good thoughts into my head and enjoy life at least a little- and this was so harmless.
You cannot wait for the approval of others for you to exist. You already do.
You don't have the "luxury" to miss the opportunity to thrive.
It's YOUR chance and it will be you who is stuck with the rewards or consequences of your actions.
Not those who demand or expect you to gain their permission to do something.
This has to be your own decision.
Opportunities don't wait, they dissipate like the mist.
Time fleets on.
Time does not change people. People have to make their decisions regardless.
Later, when people question you - actions speak louder, VOLUMES louder than words.
If you dated the right person because you took the opportunity.
If you passed the exam, won the race, got yourself through college, got the job, got the promotion, get healthy and fit-
Those who expect you to get their permission don't have enough to compensate for "opportunity costs". They don't have the ability to grant you any more time that you lost accommodating THEIR inhibitions.
If they are intimidated, they have to figure it out. You are not the cause of their problems, therefore it is not your responsibility to fix it and it would be stupid for anyone to hurt others expecting it to solve their problems.
People have gone through entire lifetimes and centuries without fixing problems and nothing gets better. So obviously the "punishment" is a nasty unnecessary power trip.
People confuse thriving on negativity for power.
They have to chose to fix the problem.
If they impose undesirable consequences on others which is not going to fix their problems, what's the prize? For either party?
And you.
When someone says, "why didn't you take that class?"
Why didn't you apply for that position?
It only reflects on you, not the "influence" who used social power that you voluntarily gave to them to make your decisions for you.
On the contrary. don't wait for things to happen to you. They say, "good things come in time".
This quote is missing the quintessential, "the ball has to be rolling somewhere in the right direction for good things to happen".
I personally find the Manifest Destiny people to be hyperarrogant assholes with a complex and the insane desire to condescend for a power trip.
Back during my first job out of college, the team lead had repercussions with a brain tumor he eventually lost his battle to. He was getting on my case about being a "health nut" because he had to be (according to what the "status quo" accepts as good information-is something I contradict but I'll get to that tangent one of these days)....he did all of the right things and he still, unfortunately lost his battle to cancer maybe a year or two later. Did he deserve it? NO. The punishment didn't fit the crime.
What sucks about this is that people don't judge on what they do but only the results. It's SUPPOSED to work out, but it doesn't. In order to be a legit judge of character, people need to consider the decisions, insight, actions, objective and situation. It's too hard for the negative people.
Also, it is not a shame to indulge in the rewards alone. That part confused me. I thought people would celebrate my success for the trouble I was caused. Oh, I was so wrong- they were not there when I needed them- they were not there when I needed someone to celebrate with. What was even more disappointing is that the people who posed as confident, self assured, "true blue" pals are actors. They are not confident.
Case in point. After I got my degree and some creds- others from high school(WHO CAME FROM MUCH MORE THAN WHAT I HAD) decided only then to go after their Masters. I can't afford to go after my masters. Envy is their only motivation. These are the people I supported as a friend or peer but they were not there for me. None of them were. I don't know that I was ever a threat to them or when it happened. I had to take my chances. They chose not to.
If I didn't take myself out to Malibu yesterday- nobody would've taken me. Those who would - they were able to go home back east. My family's roots are in California.
One friend was nice enough to treat me to Starbucks. I like Starbucks and Turkish coffee. I'm treated better when I'm courted. People wonder why some of us are not "loyal". Loyalty is a two way street.
I NEED to get good thoughts into my head and enjoy life at least a little- and this was so harmless.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)